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  • Writer's pictureHeather Roberts

Wrong gift?! Ugh.

Wrong gift?

brown paper gift box with tag


I saw rows of perfect cube carboard boxes being filled, lined up and tied with a simple string.

“What do you put in the gift box that is perfect for that person?” God asked.

“I don’t know.” I said.

“You’ve spoken correctly. You don’t know but I do.”

It’s then He brought a flood of remembrance of spoken and unspoken words into my mind of times I gave a good gift and other times I had given the wrong gift.

“You may think you know exactly what that friend or family member needs and by golly with your own short-sighted wisdom you are going to give it to them. When in fact they may need the exact opposite.”

·         You think they need advice, and they need understanding.

·         You think they need wisdom, and they need compassion.

·         You think they space, and they need a hug.


“Death and life are in the power of the tongue,

And those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words.” (Prov. 18:21, AMP)


The only way to make sure the gift you are giving someone is the correct one for them is to let God tell you what you need to say or not say to the person.

You may feel rejected because you gave that person exactly what you would have wanted had you been in that same situation, and they did not respond well.

Move on from this rejection and ask God and them what they need instead of making assumptions.

This can be true for yourself as well. Give yourself time for prayer and space to consider what you need in each situation. Don’t assume what you have always done to heal or to enjoy life is what is best for you in this season. God is your designer, and He knows what is needed in all things. He will never give you the wrong gift. Even when the gift may seem difficult.

Give yourself grace and have patience with yourself. Try again with that loved one and don’t be afraid to say I’m sorry. I meant to help you in this difficult time, and I hurt you instead. There is so much healing that happens with an apology for both parties. Unfortunately, they are so rare.


Prayer for you and me: Lord, help us to submit to Your great design for us and our relationships. Teach us to be patient with ourselves and others. Help us to know what to say and when not to speak. In Jesus’ mighty name. Amen.

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1 Comment

Carla Gasser
Carla Gasser
Nov 22, 2023

This is such a good reminder, Heather! So many times I rush in when I need to take the time to pray and ask the Holy Spirit before I speak.

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